The Life of an Unborn Slayer
by Electra3
Summary: Buffy is devistated by the lose of her mother and she turns to Spike for help. Then as there relationship grows she becoms pregnant. The counsil sends a creature called The Hound to kill her. Can her parents protect this future warrior?
1. Finding Yourself

CHAPTER 1 "Finding Yourself"  
  
In life there are times when you don't really understand your purpose in life and you don't know if you even want there to be. When you think life is bad something else happens to make your life even worse. You can't escape the day to live in the night, you can't imagine your life anymore upside down then it is in that instant. But then sometimes it does become more of a mess and you like it, like the way it makes you wonder if it is right or wrong. It is exhilarating! It is an ongoing battle to live life the way you want. I am just a girl that is caught in the middle of it all and to understand I'm gona take a little trip in time to show you why.  
  
Buffy felt her heart pounding and it felt like her chest was going to explode. She felt like screaming but the words caught in her throat. She knew Willow and Xander would try to help her but she wouldn't bring herself to look weak in front of them. They have been her friends ever since she and her family moved to Sunnydale. She had saved their lives many of times and cried on their shoulders very few. She sobbed and she felt as thought she could not breathe. She felt the tears course down her cheeks and falling to the ground.  
  
She pulled herself from the trance that had overwhelmed her and started walking. She had no idea where she was going but she needed to go somewhere and the graveyard is just where she found herself. Images of her mother laying under the ground in this graveyard made her cringe. She felt her lungs burning and she was gasping for breath.  
  
Her legs felt weak and she felt like she was going to fall to the ground and die. She didn't know if she even wanted to live. Her life was turning into a living hell and she didn't know if she could withstand the trials that would come to pass in the next days.  
  
Life was a torturous thing for the slayer but it was even harder for Buffy than most. Most slayers didn't care for sister, friends, and the world. The world rested upon her shoulders as it did with all the previous slayers but the responsibilities that she carried were not.  
  
She tried to calm herself and it didn't work it just seemed to make it harder for her to stand. She wiped her eyes and she saw rows and rows of graves. Her mother would soon be resting like all the people that inhabited the graves. She felt her body beginning to shake and she leaned against a crypt for balance.  
  
She needed to be held, she needed to be comforted, and she needed to forget. She looked around and she saw the old worn crypt that one vampire named Spike lived in. She stumbled over and hit the door forcefully. The door swung open and she smelt cigarettes and vodka in the dry stale air.  
  
"Buffy come in. What's the matter?" Spike asked moving aside letting her inter the crypt.  
  
"I know I'm suppost to be strong and be there for everyone but I can't! I just found my mom laying there and she was icy and cold. I couldn't do anything! I was born to save the universe and I couldn't even save my own mother! I've saved millions of lives or more and I couldn't even save the most important person in my life! I don't know what to do Spike. You are my enemy and yet here I am crying on your shoulder like the little girl I feel like!" Buffy Ann Summers cried.  
  
"Slayer, I know your hurting and I understand but you need to tell me what is bothering you even more than the death of your mum." Spike whispered motioning for her to sit next to him on the couch.  
  
"My dad he will try to take Dawn away and I don't know what to do. She is the only piece of my mother I have left. If she is taken away from me I think I would die! My life is just wrong. Tell me what to do, seriously just tell me, I need to know because I'm completely lost." Buffy cried taking the seat next to her enemy  
  
"Buffy I'm really sorry I had no idea what you were going through and I acted like a wanker. I don't really know what to tell you except I think it will work out. I mean your dad couldn't pass the puppy dog eyes. You are one tough girl to beat and when it comes to Dawn I don't think you are going to lose." He explained rubbing her back soothingly trying to make the slayer feel better.  
  
"You don't know my dad, he is one hard person to handle. I remember when I was out late with my friends and I lost track of time and stayed out till 3:30, it was five hours pass my curfew. I came in and he was setting on the stairs. I tried to pretend I didn't know what time it really was and give him a hug goodnight but he really didn't fall for it. He told me that my curfew was going to be an hour earlier, I was grounded for five weeks (one for every hour I was gone), I had to inform him where I was going and who I was with when I got home and I had to call him every hour I was gone telling him what my plans were for a month. Not to mention he was going to give me more information on my punishment after that was over." She remembered smiling at how well that memory had stayed intact.  
  
"Doesn't sound like it was very appealing at all. He sounds like the real ideal pain in the ass. So are you really sure he is gona try and take Nibblet away?" Spike asked concern evident in his piercing blue eyes.  
  
"When they got the divorce the deal was that mom had custody of us untill she died or we turned eighteen. He will try to take her and I don't know what to do. I feel like a piece of me is lost and that is my mother and if I lose Dawn there will be a bigger space inside of me that I can never fill or at least I have no idea how to. I'm scared and I don't know what to feel, do, or even if I should take the memories and feelings and hide them in the depths of my heart and let my dad take her. If I let her go she will be away from the Hellmouth and the evil creatures that inhabits it, but then I wouldn't be able to protect her from the evil creatures in L.A." Buffy cried out flinging her arms around his neck and berring her face in the crook of his neck.  
  
"Shh it's okay just let it all out. It will all be okay and it will work out. Shh, I promise I will protect Dawn and you. You might be my enemy but I won't let anyone hurt you because I'm the only one that is allowed to do that and that sure is hell isn't me." Spike cooed into her ear and she curled closer into his arms and her crying lessened.  
  
"I just don't know what to do. I'm scared as hell and that is saying something because we are standing right on the Hellmouth! I am just so confused right now and I just need to get some kind of closer and I am just so alone!"  
  
"You are never alone Buffy. I am always right here. I will never leave you when you need somebody. I will do whatever you need done because. you are my friend. I don't want you sad so why would I not be there?" Spike said soothingly why he took in her scent and the very essence of mixed emotions that encircled her. He wanted nothing more than for to be happy and for everything to be all right, he hated her being sad because when she is sad all he ever wants to do in encircle her in his cold arms and hold her until the pain subsided. He was becoming a real softie when it came to his slayer.  
  
"Do you think mom knew he would try to take Dawn away from me? She couldn't have, could she? She wouldn't leave me alone." Buffy asked more silent tears falling down her cheeks  
  
"I think she knew, but she didn't expect anything to happen to her so she wouldn't have even thought about mentioning it to you and Nibblet. Your mum wouldn't purposely lay this burden upon you, you know it's true." He said softly putting an arm around Buffy pulling her closer to his chest.  
  
Buffy snuggled closer to him letting him comfort her. "Thanks for understanding Spike, you were the only person I thought I could talk to and not seem like a baby. I don't know why but I think we kinda understand each other."  
  
"We do understand each other slayer, well we have always been each others equals. You know what I mean we don't need to keep secrets because what won't we understand that the other is going through?" He replied resting his chin on the top of Buffy's head.  
  
"Nothing. Well maybe I don't know what is like to have the vampiric erges or the manly erges, but you don't know what it is like to have womanly erges or slayer duties. Rather than that I think we know each other very well." She responded smiling slightly at the lightness in her chest.  
  
"Feel better?" Spike mumbled looking into her beautiful green eyes that sparkled like diamonds in the poor lighting of the crypt.  
  
"I really do. I think I just wana stay here a little bit longer if that is all right." She said her voice hoarse from sobbing.  
  
"Spike did you kill your mother?" She asked a moment later then cringed at how wrong it was to bring up the subject of his long dead mother.  
  
"No, she was the only thing I ever protected. My sire killed her. She didn't even scream she just let the pain overwhelm her and excepted her fate. I just watched and didn't even try to stop it. I guess it was just as bad as doing it myself, I still have the blood on my hands. I have a lot of blood on my hands." He whispered a longing in his voice that could only come with regret and pain.  
  
"Do you wish you had done something to stop him from killing her?" She asked  
  
"No, she was really sick and going through a lot of pain. At least that way she didn't suffer as much. It would be a real mental breakdown if I kept wondering the what ifs. My mind is already a mess I don't need to screw it up anymore than it already is." He replied a single tear rolling down his pale cheek. He quickly wiped it off so it wouldn't be seen, he was not one that wanted to seem weak.  
  
"You don't have to hide the tears with me William. You can see what your feeling just by looking into your eyes. Your eyes are the gateway to your soul. And yes I said your soul." Buffy responded  
  
"You called me William. It's been years since anyone called me that and gosh I didn't even know you knew that my real name was William." He whispered smiling slightly.  
  
"I know a lot of things about you that you don't know. I know that your biological father is Liam Deverx a.k.a. Angel. Your mom was Mary and they used to call her Sister Mary because she was always really nice, gentle, and kind. You had one sister and her name was Felicity. You and your sister would always read by the fire and talk before bed." She said a big smile spreading across her lips. "My life was so boring! I like life now I do whatever I want when I want to and don't have to ask for permission to do it. I live a very comfortable life but if I got a choice I would change a couple if things that I am not going to tell anyone about because I don't want anyone to know at the present time." Spike mumbled  
  
"Bet you didn't know anybody still knew that about you anymore. I listened when Willow was telling me all the soft history about you, it tells you everything about you in the Watchers diaries. They have to you killed two slayers in your lifetime and that is more than most ever kill not to mention at such a young age. You are kinda like a vampire celebrity." Buffy reminded him.  
  
"You are not suppose to know all that about me. Know you know how much of a Poof I was when I was alive. That isn't a good thing for anyone to know let alone the slayer. Your gonna use this against me one of these days to get me to do something." He predicted  
  
"Yea probably but can you blame me? I'm a girl that is kinda what I do I find out stuff about people and use it against them. It is actually a pretty good setup, mom taught it to me." She said another wave of tears racking through her body at the reminder of her mother and what would come to pass now that she was gone.  
  
"Shh, Buffy please don't cry. I know even the slightest reminder of her can hurt now but it will get better. This will all go away no matter how hard it seems right now but it will. They leave but something will take her place in a way and make you forget." He soothed taking a necklace out of his pocket. He placed it around her neck.  
  
"What's this?" She asked running her fingers over the ruby necklace that was in the shape of a moon.  
  
"I came across it about a hundred years ago and the person that sold it to me said that it was a healing stone that was made by one of the most powerful witches. I keep it thinking it might do me some good and it did so I believe it will help you. Please try it and if it works keep it if it doesn't keep it anyway." He whispered whipping the tears off of her face with a gentle touch.  
  
"Thanks, I don't know what to say except that is very thoughtful of you." Buffy whispered trying to cough back the tears that threatened to overwhelm her once again.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"Dawnie please don't cry. Shh it will be okay I promise. I know it hurts but it will subside." Willow whispered into the youngest Summers ear hoping it would make her feel better, while she made a silent prayer to the goddess asking her to heal the teenagers soul.  
  
"Will, how is she doing? Is she any better?" Xander asked walking into the room that contained the upset women that were huddled into a ball holding each other.  
  
"She is getting better, I just hope Buffy gets home from slaying soon, I think Dawn just wants her big sis here with her." Willow responded pulling Xander into the sobbing hug.  
  
"Dawn do you think you can stay with Xander while I make all of us some hot chocolate?" She asked pulling Dawn's head up to look at her.  
  
"Yea!" She croaked out flinging her arms around Xander in the same manner she had Willow.  
  
"Go on Will she will be okay without you for a couple of minutes. She doesn't care who is holding her just as long as someone is." He whispered so only Willow could here him.  
  
"Okay." She responded walking out of the room. "I'll be back in a minute."  
  
"She'll be fine Will, promise. She is with me now, everything is gonna get better." Xander responded giving her a loving smile.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"Buffy are you okay? If not you van stay here all night but I think your friends would ask questions and you wouldn't want to tell them you were with me so you better go if you don't want to answer there questions." He replied trying to be helpful by making her go back to the people she wasn't embarrassed about being with. That very fact hurt him in places that he thought couldn't feel anything except hate anymore, his heart.  
  
"I don't wanna go yet. Just let me stay here a little bit longer." She whispered yawning and laying her head back in his lap.  
  
"Buffy as much as I want to hold you right now and as much as I want you to stay, if you stay you are gonna go to sleep and be really pissed at me for not making you go home." He responded even though he didn't want to say it, he wanted to hold her in his arms and make the hurt go away, he wanted to make her the Buffy that she was before Joyce had died.  
  
"I won't get mad so just let me sleep and don't worry about it." She mumbled tiredly.  
  
"Can I get that in writing?" He asked a smile spreading across his lips.  
  
"In the morning." She replied then her eyes shut as she fell into sleep.  
  
"I will get my ass kicked in the morning not that comment in writing. As much as I like holding her I really have to stop and think if I really want to let her stay or not, but then I remember when she is not in pain I don't even exist so I think I will take the consequences." He whispered rubbing his fingers through his hair and taking a not needed breath. "Until the morning I will be a happy vampire.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"Buffy should be home now." Dawn whispered to herself in the confinement of her dark room. "She probably went somewhere that would make her feel better. I don't know who that is anymore but she definitely went somewhere. I wish I would have been able to go to the person that makes me feel better. Spike would know exactly how to make me feel better, he always does. I think it is because he has been through almost every torment imaginable. He is really a strong willed guy. It must be hard to watch everything close to you die or leave you alone why he still lives. I hate watching anybody die but to know that it is just gonna keep happening and everyone you ever love, Everyone you will ever care about will just pass into the next place why you just stay there. Even thinking about it makes me sick." * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"Buffy you have to wake up now it's light outside and you know they are worried about you. You have been here all night." Spike whispered running a cold hand along her cheek.  
  
" Oh my gosh! They are gonna kill me! I am late, really late!" She screamed getting up in a panic.  
  
"It's okay they won't be up yet. You can just sneak in the window and pull the I got in late, you just didn't hear me thing." He added thoughtfully handing her jacket to her softly.  
  
"I could kill you for letting me stay that late!" She screamed pulling the jacket onto her shoulders.  
  
"You told me to let you sleep so I did. You also said you would put it into writing that it was your fault you are still here now. Don't worry about who is to blame and just get home before anybody gets up!" He ordered pushing her outside the crypt.  
  
"Your right I need to go!" She mumbled then turning around and running in the direction of her house.  
  
"They are gonna kill me and then I am gonna come back to haunt Spike for making me be late! Okay it's my fault but he shouldn't have listened to me in the first place, so that makes it his fault like always!" She mentally argued with her conscious. "It really is his fault and I am just gonna keep telling myself that until I actually believe it. It will work. It has to because I am not apologizing to Spike for yelling at him. He is a vampire and I am the slayer. I kill his kind not apologize to it! It is against the rules of slayerixm." She tried to convince herself.  
  
She climbed in the window and carefully changed into her pajamas and made the bed look messy and walked into the bathroom to mess up her hair and then she would get a shower just to act and look normal. It was the oldest trick the parents into thinking you made curfew trick, it had to work on friend and sisters too.  
  
"Hey Dawn your up early. Are have you never went to sleep?" Buffy asked softly.  
  
"Well I heard your water running and I decided to get up. And you don't have to worry I made a lot of noise in your room last night so they thought you came in late." Dawn said smiling at her sisters surprised look.  
  
"You really are like me, and that really isn't a good thing because being like me gets you into trouble." She mumbled pouring orange juice into two glasses.  
  
"Well I watched you when you were pulling it and decided if it worked for you it would work for me." She responded  
  
"Well you made one mistake." Buffy whispered slyly stepping closer to her sister.  
  
"And that would be what?" She asked taking a step away from her sister.  
  
"Well that is a secret between me, myself, and I. But I will tell you one thing, you are gonna be in so much trouble if you ever try that on me!" She threatened.  
  
" Remind me not to tell you when I do it then." Dawn said with a sly gleam in her eye.  
  
" You are the hardest person to get along with I swear!" She yelled "I should ground you and make you wish you had never said that! But I won't because if I did I would have to explain my actions."  
  
"I guess I win then. Remind me to always win." She added smugly  
  
"Dawn I am giving you three minutes to get out of my face before I remind you what slayer strength really is!" Buffy sweared  
  
"You do that and I will tell everyone that you were gone all night and I swear I will find out where you were and I promise it won't be a pretty site!" Dawn retaliated cleansing her fists into balls.  
  
"You are impossible! I don't know howI ever got along with you! You are acting like a total bitch!" She yelled causing Willow to wake up and run down the stairs.  
  
"What's the matter? Are you all okay?" She asked in a shaky voice  
  
"Yea will, everything is okay me and Dawn were just having a little argument." Buffy replied walking up the stairs.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"Don't Luv it's all right. You were just a little upset. There's nothing wrong with that." He whispered  
  
"Yea I know that but I am suppose to kill you not lay sobbing in your arms." She sobbed adding sexy to her description of him silently.  
  
"You can kill me after you stop crying." Spike said into her ear.  
  
"But don't really want to kill you I just wish I knew why everytime I get upset I run to you. It shouldn't be like that, but I like it. I mean I like the way you comfort me. 


	2. Revelations

Chapter 2 "Revelations"  
  
You are a scarred and wounded soldier lying on the battlefield sobbing because you don't have the courage to stand. You feel like your heart is dying and the only thing in the world is pain. Why do the chosen always have to feel so much pain? You are the only think standing in your way of victory and happiness. You have only one ally and that is your enemy. Happiness lies in the heart of your undertaking. Pain lies in the arms of your father and hope is in the eyes of your comforter. Get up and walk the path you are intended to follow and you will be the one to make it through the world. Now you are a lifeline and the cable cannot be broken as long as you stay up! Pain is only in the mind and the mind is so weak. Don't hide from your Destiny live it!  
  
"Willow Did dad call when I was out last night?" She asked setting down on the couch beside her best friend.  
  
"Yea sorry I forgot to tell you. He said his plane would be leaving today at noon and he would be here as soon as he can." She explained.  
  
"Thanks Will I am gonna go out for a little bit, I'll be back in an hour or so." Buffy said pulling on her coat and walking out the door  
  
Buffy's POV- What am I suppose to do I just can't make him leave Dawn in my care. I feel like I am on a ship and I am about to get seasick or something. I need to fight him but he's my father and he only wants the best for Dawn, but I can't live without her. I need to forget about this, about her, about my life, I need to feel nothing. I don't have anyone to turn to. Spike would hold me and make me laugh but I don't know how to talk to him after last night. I know nothing happened and I was just upset but I know I felt content in his arms and I shouldn't feel that way. The way he talked to me, it just . I don't know, Okay it made me feel like I did when I was with Angel. I felt like I couldn't breathe. I can't let myself make that kind of mistake again. Buffy thought as silent tears fell down her rosy cheeks. She started sobbing and before she even knew what happened she was pressed against a cold chest, his arms encircling her, comforting her, but most of all letting her cry out her fears and the millions of emotions that were in the heart and mind of the slayer.  
  
" Shh it's okay Luv, it's okay." Spike whispered stroking her back gently.  
  
Years of fears and unshed tears fell onto her enemy's shirt. He swiftly pulled her from her feet and carried her back to his crypt. He gently sat her down and let her cry into his shoulder.  
  
Spike's POV as he held her - She feels so much pain. More than any girl should ever know. She carries the world on her back and she doesn't even show it. This pain shouldn't be upon her. I wish she was happy and not in this situation. I don't know what happened so I don't know what to say but I don't think she needs someone to tell her what to do, I think she needs someone to listen. I will kill That Bastard if he hurts her! She needs happiness not regret.  
  
"Spike! He's on his way. I can't do this. The way he talks to me, it's like I can't do anything I am powerless when he's around."  
  
"Luv, Shh it's okay. I promise it's gonna be okay. Buffy look at me." He commanded his voice turning cold but not hard.  
  
Buffy lifted her tear stained face and looked into his gentle blue eyes. "I feel really stupid right now."  
  
"Don't. I won't let him hurt you. And if he took Dawn away that would hurt you so I promise it won't happen. Have I ever lied to you? No, not even when I was trying to kill you." Spike whispered kissing her forehead softly.  
  
"They're leaving today so I can talk to my father. You think you could come with me so I won't be alone?" Buffy asked her mind screaming at her to just walk out.  
  
" Slayer, you know I will. I said if I could do anything that I would." He responded wiping the last of the tears that flowed down her soft cheek off. She nuzzled her face into his hand making him smile uncomfortably.  
  
"What Spike does it bother you that I like your cold hands on my face?" She asked pulling her head away from him. He groaned as her warm face pulled away from him. "Spike, do you think that we really I mean really get along?"  
  
" Slayer I think we kinda already established that. But yea." Spike retaliated pulling his leather coat on his muscular body.  
  
" That's what I thought I just ... So do you think dad will be hard to get along with?" She asked in a soft voice that seemed to flow with the wind.  
  
" Please don't make me nervous. Well more so than I am already. I don't really like meeting the parent." He responded handing her jacket to her. " But no I don't think he will be that hard to deal with. If it comes down to it we can always just kill him."  
  
Buffy backhanded him and then doubled over laughing at the I'm sorry two year old look that she got from the master vampire. " I can't believe you Spike you just looked so much like a child."  
  
" Well thank-you for telling half the population of Sunnydale!" He said in a harsh tone that made Buffy quiver.  
  
" I'm sorry." She whispered lowering her head for a moment. " Well not really but..." She added falsely.  
  
" Don't be slayer." He whispered and that would be the last word said until they got to the Summers' house.  
  
" Spike you're here, with Buffy." Dawn said in a worried tone.  
  
"Don't worry Nibblet, you're big sis asked me to come with her and give her a little support when your dad gets here." He replied rubbing her back affectionately.  
  
" Okay that means a lot to me. You and Buffy being friends. You guys are meant to be friends. You fight for the same thing and you are both really good people." Dawn replied.  
  
"Buffy is a good person Dawn. I'm the evil wait very evil vampire." He replied smiling softly at the young girl that stood before him.  
  
"Look at him Buffy he's pretending to be an evil vampire, how cute." Dawn said in a baby voice.  
  
"It is not cute it is the truth!" He yelled playfully at the girls.  
  
Dawn tackled him making him fall to the floor and he started tickling her. "Buffy help!" Dawn screeched laughing hysterically. Buffy quickly joined them and they all started wrestling in a heap on the white carpet.  
  
"This is not funny guys!" The youngest Summers' women yelped rolling onto her side in yet another fit of giggles.  
  
Then they stopped and hurried to their feet as the doorbell rang suddenly. The ding-dong of the bell almost made Buffy start crying again but she was determined to be strong not only for Dawn but for her mother. Her mother would want Dawn to be with her sister and Buffy knew that. "Here we go." She whispered as Spike patted her back softly.  
  
She slowly walked over to the door and unlatched the lock. Her hand trembled as she opened the door and it was quickly replaced by determination. I can do this I can't loose her not now. She thought as she saw her father standing there with his duffel bag and a smaller bag.  
  
"Dad, it's... I'm glad you're here. Dawn and I have really missed you." She said in a shaky yet determined voice. "Come in."  
  
"Thank-you Buffy and I'm sorry I wasn't here earlier, I was on a business trip." Hank replied hugging his daughter softly.  
  
"Yea I heard about that." She replied pulling away from him  
  
"Buffy I'm sorry I really am but there was no way that I could be here any sooner than I am." He responded firmly.  
  
"Dad Dawn is in the kitchen doing homework I trust you remember the way." She added walking away in an angry stance.  
  
"Dad! It you! I can't believe you are finally here." Dawn yelled jumping into his arms.  
  
"Buffy who is this?" Hank proceeded to ask pointing at Spike.  
  
"This is William Deverx but you can call him Spike everyone does. He is helping with the arrangements and just being a shoulder for us to cry on." Buffy replied smiling at Spike softly.  
  
"Buffy I always thought we taught you better than this. Your mother dies and the first thing you do is let your boyfriend stay I'm guessing in your bedroom!" Hank said in a very firm tone.  
  
"One is so not my boyfriend and secondly you can not just come here and patronize me! I can't do this on my own and he has been there for us, but nothing more than a friend!" Buffy yelled her temper rising at a very fast rate.  
  
"Buffy calm down." Spike whispered in a very soft voice.  
  
"This has been an eye-opener and I have decided that Dawn should come back with me to LA. You apparently lack the maturity to take care of your sister and yourself. Your mother would turn over in her grave if she saw your behavior." Hank growled putting his finger very close to Buffy's face.  
  
"I really think you need to sit down and listen to me. Spike is a friend that is trying to help us through this and he is nothing more. I needed someone and he has been here for me when no one else was and I think you owe him an apology for you accusations." Buffy retaliated stepping away from him.  
  
Spike and Dawn were in a corner trying not to get in the way of the conversation. "Do you think I will have to go with him? I don't want to leave Spike, this is my home and I don't want to leave it!"  
  
"Nibblet don't worry. Your sister will make him change his mind and I am promising you that he is not going to take you anywhere." Spike responded his hand closed in a tight fist to control the anger that was rising in his throat.  
  
"Dad I think we can resume this conversation in the morning. It's late and I want to take a shower and try to forget that this conversation ever happened." Buffy replied picking up her father's things and carrying them up the stairs.  
  
It felt wrong taking her father's things into her mother's old room. It was wrong in her mind. But it did used to be his room with her mother and it was the only room that wasn't occupied by anyone. And she couldn't just ask him to sleep on the couch.  
  
She wanted to make him leave the house and never come back but she knew that if she did that it would only make her current situation with her father worse, and she really didn't need it any more complicated than it already was.  
  
She walked down the stairs and pulled on her jacket. "Dawn if dad asks where I am just tell him I went to sleep and not to bother me because I'm trying to calm myself down and if he interrupts me it will ruin the peaceful essence that encircles the room." Buffy instructed.  
  
"No problem Buff I'll just act like you are into that and he will probably see right through me but that's okay because he probably won't ask to see you after the fight you just had with him." Dawn responded pulling her sister into a quick hug. "Oh and Spike you let anything hurt her and I will kill you."  
  
"Nibblet you know I wouldn't let anything hurt your big sis." He whispered messing up her hair playfully.  
  
"Bye!" She called after the pair as they walked out of the house. "They make the perfect couple if only they could see that."  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"So Buffy how are you gonna handle this whole thing with your dad. And remember I can always eat him for you, yea it might hurt a little but I could handle it." Spike offered getting hit in the back of his head in response.  
  
"Thank-you for everything but I don't know if it will work out. I froze in there and what if I can't convince him to let Dawn stay here. I am not as confident as you are Spike." She whispered laying her head on his shoulder lightly.  
  
"Do you want me to patrol tonight so you can rest?" Spike asked as he put an arm around her shoulders amazed that she was letting him touch her.  
  
"No I want to be out of the house for a while and this is the only thing that I want to do right now. I would go to the Bronze but then none of my friends are there so it would be a lost cause. Well now that I think of it, it sounds like a great idea. So you wanna come with?" Buffy asked looking into his deep blue eyes. She felt content and safe in that moment just looking into his eyes. She wondered if all of the people around him lost themselves in his eyes like she was doing at that very moment.  
  
"If you want to be seen with me I don't see why it would be a problem." He responded turning his face away from her.  
  
"Why do you turn your eyes away from me when you know I love looking into them? They are beautiful Spike you really shouldn't hide them." Buffy whispered turning his head back to look at her.  
  
"I don't know I just hate people seeing my emotions in them and I hate my emotions showing. It really makes me feel like a Poof." He responded walking into the Bronze.  
  
"Do you want to dance?" Buffy asked looking out onto the dance floor while she gently pulled on his arm urging him to dance. Her heart pounded for reasons she didn't want to know.  
  
He didn't respond he just led her onto the dance floor and pulling her against his chest softly. She curled her arms around his neck and swayed gently with the music. He took a deep breath and he could smell the light smell of vanilla and Jasmine. She drew little circles on his back and held him tight against her. The world seemed to melt away leaving just the two of them, the dance floor and the soft music that poured from the stage.  
  
She breathed in his scent and it consumed her. It smelt of cigarettes and her, it would normally make a person sick but to her it was comforting. Her heart was beating faster then normal and Spike could feel the beating against his chest like it was a part of him.  
  
Buffy looked up at him and their eyes meet and he let her stare into his eyes for what seemed like an eternity. His eyes mesmerized her and it calmed her fears almost instantly. Her hand went up and she rubbed her hand down his soft cheek. Her hand was shaking but neither of them seemed to care. She pulled down his face and their lips meet in a soft and fiery kiss. Their tongues dueled and then she broke the kiss. She laid her head on his shoulder and her laced his arms around her.  
  
The song ended and she pulled him outside. He expected her to tell him that it was a mistake but she didn't she just wrapped her arm around his waist. "Walk me home."  
  
The walk there was hell for him he didn't know if she wanted him to say something or stay quiet so he chose to be quiet because he had no clue what to say. "Spike stop right here."  
  
"Why are we stopping?" He asked confused by the sudden speech.  
  
"I don't want dad to see us together because I don't want him to think I went to see you, I know I did but I'm not ready to tell him that." Buffy responded pressing her lips to his in a brief passionate kiss. "Night William."  
  
"Night Slayer." He called as Buffy ran to the house at a dead run.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"So Buffy can I come in?" Dawn asked through the closed door to Buffy's room.  
  
"Sure. So did dad ask anything? Oh by the way nothing was out it was a clear patrol." Buffy replied running a brush through her golden blonde hair.  
  
"No dad didn't ask anything. So nothing at all was out? I thought with the slayer being distracted and all that I thought that there would be a ton of things out." She responded  
  
"Well there was nothing out so I guess they know nothing about me beside I'm the slayer and I am gonna kill them if I find them in my town." Buffy replied in an agitated tone.  
  
"I guess that's why. So there was not even one vampire out?" She asked confused at how boring her sister's patrol had been.  
  
"Well Spike was out on patrol with me so if you count him as a vampire then yea there was a vampire out. But we better change the subject because dad could over hear us talking about vampires and he would probably try to say we are insane. Then we would try to get around it and it wouldn't work so lets not put us in the situation." Buffy rambled on not realizing Dawn was giving her a very weird look.  
  
"You are so very weird when it comes to your job. Speaking of job are you gonna start working anywhere?" Dawn asked switching her weight on to her other leg.  
  
Buffy looked at her sister as though she was insane and she couldn't here a word she was saying. "Dawn I'm a little tired can we finish this conversation in the morning?"  
  
"Sure Buff. Get a bath to because you look like crap." Dawn added leaving the room as silently as she came.  
  
"I think I will do that. It will help take away some of the tension that I am feeling right now."  
  
She laid down on the bed and remembered the fights her mother and father used to have that would make her and Dawn so sad. They would yell and scream and sometimes they would even take the fight up stairs so he could do god knows what to her.  
  
Her mother would be so sad and she wouldn't even tell them what was wrong.  
  
Her mother had picked them up from school one and they had known something was wrong by the way that her eyes were not bright but very dull. She had taken them home and told them that their father and her were going to move into separate houses and they needed to choose where they wanted to live. They both chose to stay with their mother and it had broken their father's heart but they didn't want to leave the house they had grown up in.  
  
Buffy's heart broke at the memories and she felt more tears start to form. She pushed them back. She was sick of crying over what her father had made her life.  
  
She was consumed by sleep and she was very willing to go wherever it would take her. Her body curled up into a ball as the tears racked her body why she could not control them.  
I'm sorry about this chapter being up so late. The electricity was down all week so I couldn't finish it. The next chapter will be very long and it will be a very sad chapter with a happy ending. Expect it up around the first or second week in March. Please review and don't lie, I want to know exactly what you think even if you don't like it. - Trinity 


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